[Kazuya blinked. Control carbon? Now, Kazuya may not have finished school, but even he knew that a lot of things contained that stuff. Being able to control carbon meant you could manipulate lots of things, and instead he chose his hair? Well, he supposed it meant there'd be a weapon always close to you if it was a physical part of your body, but...]
Man, he'd be in trouble if he ever faced up against a barber. [Unless carbon control meant he could rapidly grow hair which would be kind of creepy and scary] Anyway, what type of person thinks, 'yes, my hair will be my weapon, I'll throttle you to death with my luxurious locks!' Pfft, your Not-Dad is weird, Major Hyou-Kyou.
Heh. I told him to focus on shears, specifically, when he was first practicing with it. Nowadays, even a chainsaw can't stand up to his version of hardened carbon.
[ He'd smiled to himself about it, back then, but he didn't (and doesn't) judge. Deep down he knows: all of the oddballs around him crave acceptance more than anything, and that's what he's tried to give them all these years.
The image of Magi fades from the plate, and — to his great surprise — he feels a little empty inside. He forces a smile. ]
[Kazuya smiled, clasping his hands behind his back and rocking slightly on his heels - he looked so innocent, to the point where it was obvious that he was intentionally being a little shit]
It sounds cute, right? Totally. I think it fits you perfectly!
[Was he calling you cute? Probably. To be honest Kazuya thought he looked kinda snappy in that uniform, even if it was a bit creepy that he was wearing a middle-school one when Kaz got the vibe that he was older than that. He must be a pervert in disguise. Or... one that was pretty open in his kinks. Well, whatever, Kaz wasn't going to judge a man on his private... desires... so long as they were harmless]
But, if you don't like it, I guess I can call you Hyou-ojii-san.
[ Ordinarily, being called "ojii-san" would enrage him, but...
It doesn't escape him that Kazuya just called him — in a roundabout fashion — "cute." This old soul, or alternately this regular seventeen-year-old twerp is flirting with him. ]
[ With difficulty, he forces the sadness out of his eyes. He smirks. ]
That's rich, coming from an "old soul."
[ He slides his hands into his pockets and turns his back on Kazuya and begins to walk off... ]
Heh. I've been called worse. Come on.
[ ...in the direction of the banquet tables, which are being set up as a buffet, piled high with every delicacy imaginable, from intricate salads with colorful vegetables cut into complex geometrical shapes, to succulent steaks, their aromas rising into the air, to many-layered cakes decorated with spun-sugar flowers. ]
[Oh, well, that was true. For the few years Hyoubu could be blagging, Kazuya still had a good few... thousand? Ten thousand? Something with far too many zeros in there, he was sure. But, hey, since he couldn't remember those years, and this body was seventeen years old, then technically speaking he couldn't be an old fogey! Right?!
(As you can see, Kazuya was determined to cling to his youth. He will never forsake it!)]
O-Old soul isn't- oi~ [He huffed as Hyoubu walked off, and after a brief moment of debate, followed him - then realising he was going towards food, practically bolted right past the esper to skid to a halt before the buffet table, looking like he'd been dumped right into heaven.
For you see, after spending time half-starved of food, scrambling after what rations were left over after the rest of the people and demons had at it, one gained a deeper appreciation for food, and this right here, man, he could marry this buffet table right now. All his favourites in one place, right there, ready for the taking, without him having to drop kick some monster in the head to get to it. Amazing]
Nnnhhhh... [An incoherent noise of absolute happiness, Kazuya clasped his hands together and looked ready to swoon] Ah, look at all of this! There's cheesecake and- holy shit, oh my god, is that mint ice cream? Ah, there's steak too!
[Looks like Hyoubu's been forgotten in the haze of food-lust. Sorry, Major]
[ He's well acquainted with this degree of food delight, given the circumstances of the kids he rescues. It's why he strives to feed and house them as lavishly as possible, with his ill-gotten gains. Smiling to himself, he levitates a plate into the air and starts telekinetically serving himself. As it turns out, he likes good food, too.
...even if he's aware there might be some nasty consequences, which given his experiences with this place seems fairly likely.
[At this point, Kazuya had began The Great Gorging, so his reply was basically a primitive grunt that could mean either 'what?', 'no', or 'bugger off I'm busy'. After a pause he did finish off the entire cheesecake he'd been in the middle of demolishing - albeit messily, with crumbs and everything smeared around his mouth - to properly reply]
Eh. Well, food was... [he paused, looking hesitant] Um. Scarce? In a way...
[Understatement. It was scarce to the point where people would murder each other for it. Yeah. That scarce. The amount of times he saw people brutally murder someone just to grab a bag of disgusting rations or stale bread or... anything edible. It was insane. Kazuya rapidly began to look uncomfortable and hurried to move the conversation along]
S-So! You know, not used to this kind of luxury! Gonna take advantage of it while I can, even if it means I'm pukin' it up afterwards!
[ Competitive eating was just starting to get popular as a spectator sport in Japan, when he was in the big house. Having quite a bit of time on his hands, he watched the competitions with a sort of morbid fascination — mostly that Normals would willingly do that to themselves. After witnessing the complete and near-instantaneous demolishing of a full-sized cheesecake, he's convinced Kazuya could be a champion.
(except for the fact that — naturally — people with powers were always banned from such competitions)
The ridiculousness of the boy's cheesecake-smeared face combined with the obvious discomfort in his expression... the effect is almost unbearably poignant. ]
That seems counterproductive. Relax.
[ Hyoubu smiles, and touches Kazuya's shoulder. ]
This place has its challenges, but fortunately lack of food isn't one of them.
[Kazuya's weight shifted slightly when Hyoubu reached out, as if to lean away, but once again, although he seemed leery of the touch, he didn't reject it. He tolerated the shoulder touch, and turned his face away, raising a hand to wipe at his mouth - even if it served only to smear the mess around more, rather than clean it]
Those're jinxing words, y'know. [he made a short gesture with his (cheesecake stained) hand, obviously warding off misfortune - even casting a wary look about him as if expecting Famine himself to come swooping down on horseback] Better not tempt fate... knowing my luck, God'll decide that'll be my next ordeal. 'Endless Famine!' or something equally stressful.
[ What an anxious, pessimistic kid, to think that God specifically is setting ordeals for him. And yet... he glances back at Kazuya's angelic robot companion, and thinks again about the casual references to the Tower of Babel. How very odd. The "many worlds" quantum theory suggests that anything is possible, and so...
Hm.
He pats the boy's shoulder and then lets his hand fall away. ]
Sounds like you've been through a lot. Want to talk about it?
Oh dear. Oh my. He slipped a bit too much - although he acknowledged it was going to happen from the start. Kazuya was terrible at lying and keeping secrets, especially concerning something like the lockdown. Though it was a horrifying experience that traumatised him deeply (waking up in cold sweat - avoiding sleep - jumping at unexpected touches - feeling that alien insidious hunger gnawing at his bones- it hurt - it felt good - no -) to the point where he was certain he probably needed a shrink in there to make him sane, it was like a scab he couldn't stop picking.
"Talk about it." He wanted to, because it would be relieving, and maybe someone would realise he was fucked up, but at the same time, it was too much effort and trouble to deal with those eyes. Crazy kid, that's all he should be]
...what's there to say? [Kazuya managed to wipe his face clean - finally - with his sleeve, revealing an odd, bordering on unsettling, smile] It was just humans being humans. Scarier than...
[Than demons, can you believe? At least a demon was rather straightforward about its desire to kill you, and Kazuya didn't mind dismembering them. Humans, on the other hand...]
It's weird. I kind of want to say, because you're a stranger, so it doesn't matter if you get disgusted with me, and it would be quite nice to unload. But... [well, he's a coward too. Ah... he should have just said it from the beginning. He dug himself into a hole now] Well, I guess... so long as you promise not to organise a mob for a lynch session, I can vent a little.
[ He twitches his fringe to one side, revealing the bullet wound scar in the center of his forehead. ]
I know exactly how humans can be.
[ He can't read Kazuya's mind, but he can read the boy's expression. Wariness, temptation, fear, self-recrimination... he's seen it all before. This kid's been through it, and he needs someone who understands, and won't judge. If only he himself had had anyone like that, back then...
Not that it matters, to an old ghost. He waves Kazuya over to a nearby table, and sits down, his own plate of food settling itself down telekinetically beside him. ]
[The bullet scar garnered Hyoubu an unreadable look - not one of pity or sympathy, but something bordering on consideration - and after a brief pause, Kazuya joined him at the table - after taking almost half of the buffet table with him of course. Multiple plates piled high with food were precariously balanced on his arms in a fashion similar to a waiter. He managed to place them on the table without a messy incident and sat down heavily, across from Hyoubu]
Where to even start... [he started shredding a buttery croissant to pieces, picking at it like a bird, a sharp contrast to his earlier, messy hunger] This has got, like, four different beginnings, and all of them are equally messed up and confusing. Plus background info...
[He trailed off. He pondered as he slowly made his way through the croissant, starting at the corner of the table. After a few minutes of this, he straightened up slowly, and brushed his hands together. Eh, he'll just plunge straight into it. Demons, Gods... it might be normal stuff in this guy's world, after all, supernatural powers were, so...]
I'll guess I'll go with something recent - I mean, this story goes back thousands of years, if you can believe it. Anyway, Naoya - remember him? - got this brilliant idea one day. [Judging by Kazuya's tone, this idea was, in fact, terrible] He decided - with a bit of funding from this cult - to create a device that would allow demon summoning without getting bogged down with all the rituals and needing to sacrifice something or have the knowledge of it at all.
[He made a small circle in the air with his finger, speaking slowly;] To summon a demon, you need to sacrifice something, or have a desire so strong, so emotionally charged, that you can sustain it that way. Naoya got rid of all that, so that the common joe could just pick up this device and summon a demon - with a catch, though. You have to be able to defeat the demon that comes out of it, since they follow a strict hierarchy of strength. They don't obey weaklings. Hah, you can imagine the chaos this caused when it was mass-distributed within Tokyo.
[Torn up roads and cars, corpses in the street, demons running wild... yeah...]
Thousands of people were killed within the first few days, then you had those who did defeat their demons and managed to control them. Some of them went a bit nuts and thought they could do whatever they wanted. Society broke down pretty fast, and worse of all, the only thing the government could do was put the 'infected zone' into a strict lockdown. Everyone was trapped in there, with crazy people and demons, and if they tried to escape, they got shot dead. Demons can take human forms, so, you know, they had to be careful.
[Kazuya sighed suddenly, as if it was something inconvenient, rather than traumatising]
I was stuck right in the middle of that. Why? Because Naoya had a plan. A brilliant one by his reckoning, but I think it was stupid. [pause] And, uh, immoral, since he technically mass murdered like half of Tokyo's population. It's messed up. Isn't that messed up? Do you know what people did there? I mean, demons are terrible, but they're like animals! They kill humans to eat them, end of. People just... ugh, they did horrible things, messed up stuff, and it was like infectious! One of my friends went off the deep end and began killing people who were 'unworthy of living'. Who gets to decide that? What, did God keel over and make Keisuke his successor? Like hell! Not even God gets to decide stuff like that because it's human lives goddammit!
[he kicked the leg of the table, making the plates jump, looking genuinely furious for a moment before it simmered into something more neutral looking]
It makes me so mad. So many people died over something so pointless.
[ He sits, listening quietly, his own plate untouched. At the end of all that, it occurs to him that now is probably not the best time to confess that he wants to kill every Normal on the face of the earth.
...except, does he really?
It's a small voice in the back of his mind, the voice of the child he used to be. Most of the time he can ignore it, or drown it out. But just now, listening to Kazuya's horrifying account, that voice is unopposed, as the rest of him is shocked into silence.
How much do you want your revenge? How deep is your hate?
He'd already decided to set aside his differences with BABEL in order to defeat Black Phantom and change the future. His Queen's life is more important than his revenge. But if he could have it all — saving the Queen's life and destroying all Normals — would he want it? ]
I don't have any answers.
[ For a moment, he seems surprised that he said that out loud. Then his features smooth out and he smiles, thinly. ]
Most deaths are pointless, in a war. People's lives are the most precious.... and the most disposable things in the world.
[Kazuya made a noise that was slightly strained, his lips pressing into a thin, white line. For a moment, it seemed like he was mute with anger, unable to reply to Hyoubu's query, before the tautness in his body slowly leached away, his hand reaching out to pluck up a palm-sized cherry tart and bite into it hungrily. His lips were stained red.
There was no way to explain Naoya's plan without revealing sensitive things, but thus far Major Hyou-Kyou had taken things in stride, was peculiar himself, and possessed supernatural abilities. Perhaps Kazuya could expose himself without worry of judgement or needing to treat him dismissively just so that any words from fear or anger wouldn't touch him]
To get revenge, obviously. Only people with that on the brain would do something so stupid. [Kazuya's tone was practically dripping with disdain, and his next bite of the tart was particularly vicious] You think after a few thousand years you'd let bygones be bygones, but no, seemed like he had nothing better to do than stew on a grudge instead of, y'know, doing something productive for society. Better yet, he decides to sacrifice a shit load of people for it and almost end humanity itself just to settle a score - and even better, he dragged me into it!
[CHOMP. That poor tart was practically being savaged]
I'm not comfortable in being a murderer - wow, what a concept! It's like I have a sense of decency or something! You know, enough of a fucking brain to go "well, that happened a long time ago, and clinging to that past is just going to fuck over the future and hurt people who are in no way, shape, or form, related to that, so may as well move forwards", but no, he's so stuck in the past he may as well be a fossil.
[The cherry tart was finished, brutually devoured by a steaming mad Kazuya. He roughly wiped his mouth clean of crumbs and hissed venomously;] He's such a child! A stupid, immature brat! You know what, next time I see him I'm gonna wallop him. Yeah! I'll beat some sense into that thick skull of his! Psh, someone needs to... that little... [Mutter, mutter, grumble, grumble, murderous glowering...]
[ Kazuya's fury paradoxically silences the voice in his head. The dark core of his hatred swells. ]
I won't deny that revenge is stupid, or that it doesn't make sense. But sometimes there's nothing left, for a person, except revenge. Some things you just can't get over, whether it's decades or thousands of years. To let "bygones be bygones"... that's like saying that it was okay, what happened. That you're fine with it. That you're fine with the things that are still happening.
[ His voice had started out measured, his face calm, but now he's shaking. His fists are clenched. ]
As for hurting innocents... no one is innocent, if they're content to mindlessly go along with the status quo.
[ He pushes back from the table. ]
Well, I'm sorry you had to get your hands dirty and have your sense of decency offended. But most of the time you have to break things before you can fix them. Somebody has to take that on.
[ He knows... he knows that his situation and Kazuya's are likely very different. That Naoya might have been motivated by nothing more than blind hatred, like Gilliam. But Kazuya's account of things has struck a nerve, and he can't really control himself. ]
[Kazuya looked briefly startled at his companion's spike of anger and hatred, making his head buzz almost unpleasantly. He shook off the instinctive (demonic) urge to pull more of those emotions out, and peered at him quizzically as if Hyoubu had done something truly and utterly strange. Well, that was a first, to hear someone justify - or, attempt to - Naoya's actions, when even demons acknowledged that the man's actions were screwed up. His surprise dulled, and something in his posture and expression shifted towards scrutinising, his gaze holding the same intensity as a cat would when locking onto a bird.
Oh.
Oh.
Hyoubu was...]
Are you serious? Didn't you hear me earlier? You don't have the right to judge someone on whether they're innocent or not, especially on something like 'ignorance', you-
[Kazuya stopped, then let out a heavy sigh, but it wasn't irritated or frustrated - he sounded more sad than anything. Keisuke thought that - thought that killing those he deemed unworthy of living, criminals and 'bad guys', would create a world more peaceful, but how can peace be built on top of the bones of others? Naoya dragged humanity into his personal grudge against God, not caring what happened to innocent people so long as he was satisfied, and Kazuya himself, who was pushed into the position of being humanity's Judge, Jury and Executioner, even if he rarely acted in the third role. It was not a position he fulfilled happily, content to push for forgiveness and redemption, as oppose to outright execution.
How can revenge and violence solve anything? It doesn't. It caused temporary peace, and then it would begin all over again, a new scar or tragedy that carried into a new generation. Kazuya wished he could somehow impart this knowledge on Hyoubu, since he did seem like an okay guy - a bit twisted by hatred, now that he was looking, but ultimately a man who was not wholly evil. But alas, Kazuya knew he wasn't very good when it came to words or inspiring speeches, and if anything made people angrier and more stubborn instead. Still, he wanted to at least try]
I know it isn't easy, forgiving a deep wrong against yourself or others. [Kazuya's voice was soft] But trust me when I say it never ends well. It may be all you have left, but hatred's like quicksand. The longer you stay in there, the deeper it's gonna suck you in, and the next thing you know, everything's distorted and...
[He remembered, vaguely, when he himself was like that, though it was more like a dream of a memory, rather than the memory itself. Of when Naoya - Cain - smashed that rock into his skull and murdered him with such singleminded viciousness, where he - Abel - cried and screamed and begged and died and felt such hatred that he tore himself apart to become a demon of vengeance instead. Looking at that hazy memory, Kazuya terrified himself. He didn't want anyone to transform into anything like that again - not Naoya, who was already some form of monster but not beyond help, and not this Hyoubu Kyousuke, either, even though he was a near stranger. The man was twisted, but still very kind. It'd be a shame if he became a monster - a bad guy - for real]
...well, you pretty much become what you're revenging against.
[ It has occurred to him, from the way Kazuya is speaking, that he's drawing from deep personal experience. But even so... Hyoubu knows very well that forgiveness is the path to redemption. But he has strayed so far from that path, he knows he'll never find it. Besides, forgiveness isn't something he's willing to give, nor does he expect it from others.
Saotome was a monster, as were his collaborators, as are all the Normals who prey upon espers.
He'd been half-standing up during Kazuya's speech, but now he sits down again, heavily. ]
You're right about that.
[ He's a monster, too. He has no illusions about that. After a while, the cloud across his face passes, his features smooth out, and he even manages a smile. ]
Well. Do you feel better now, having unburdened yourself?
[Well, the anger had been interrupted, although Kazuya was unsure if his message had gotten through. Most likely not. He frowned, but reluctantly let it go, because he didn't want to harp and preach. His words would never be considered if he became a self-righteous, insistent nag, like someone he could name (Metatron)]
Kind of. I think? Ish, maybe. I got too riled up. [he slouched in his seat, choosing which poor meal to demolish gruesomely] Bad memories aren't pleasant, even if you get like a two second bit of relief for picking at them.
[He picked up a simple-made ham sandwich, looking at it contemplatively for a moment before saying with forced casualness;] Besides, I never got round to my confession, since it's going to come out at some point. I mean, you seem like a very open minded guy, revenge issue aside, so I guess it'll be fine. Not like I care or anything, but people tend to get fussy over it.
[Once he says it, and Hyoubu accepts - well, then Kazuya can properly relax around someone and won't worry about checking himself, since he'd know the important, dark secrets to be 'in the know'. If not, then, well, he'll still hang around if he'd tolerate that, but Kazuya will know to not get emotionally invested. Safer that way.
He took a bite out of his sandwich, looking anywhere but Hyoubu, a brief pause settling over them as he chewed and swallowed. He sighed;] Okay, fuck it: I'm a demon, just so you know.
He should have anticipated this punchline, he realizes in retrospect, what with the whole "becoming the thing you hate" commentary. And "humans being humans." Now that he's paying attention, he fancies he can feel the self-loathing coming off the boy (he still thinks of Kazuya as a boy) in waves. So he's careful to keep his features composed, maintaining an expression of interest and anticipation even after Kazuya drops his bombshell, as if to imply, "is that all?" And then, when it's clear Kazuya is finished, he leans back and says pleasantly: ]
I'm afraid that really doesn't mean much to me. Demons are mythical creatures. They don't really exist. You might as well tell me you're a dragon.
[ He glances at Kazuya's ham sandwich, and then pointedly at the piles of food, and then back at Kazuya. ]
[A tension that lined Kazuya's shoulders relaxed a fraction, and he lifted his gaze, staring at Hyoubu as if trying to sniff out any sign of deceit. He couldn't see any. Hyoubu looked completely unruffled, and it was enough to make Kazuya feel a little emboldened, a hesitant smile teasing the corners of his mouth for a brief moment. He'll keep quiet on the fact that dragons exist too (in his world, at least)]
I remember being human enough to be against cannibalism. [he pulled a face at the thought - and decided not to admit to the fact that most demons were psychic vampires anyway, devouring the emotions humans experienced like some kind of succubus. The more intense, the better. As for the physical eating, well, apparently demons just liked the taste] Nope, cakes and steaks and all kinds of snacks are my main food source, so don't worry about me eyeing you up for dessert.
[ He watches Kazuya, taking in the look of disbelief, and then the tension flowing out of him, followed by a flicker of a smile. It's a familiar sight, to him. Espers are commoner now than they were in the past, and often a single esper child would be born into a town that had never seen one before. And if they were powerful...
The look on their faces when he rescued them and told them, no, you're not a monster. This is what he's seeing now, on Kazuya's. ]
And I was going to say, I suggest that you don't make a meal of my acquaintances, either.
[ There's a delicate emphasis on the word "suggest" which implies painful, drawn-out, bloody revenge. He says it with a bright smile, however, and adds: ]
But since you prefer more conventional means of sustenance, there's no need. I'm what's called an "esper," by the way. In my world, I suspect it means the same thing as "demon" does in yours.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
wow that was not the answer he'd expected. got a daddy kink, kid? ]
Ah... haha.
I meant, he can control it. Can control carbon, specifically. He chose to focus on his hair.
[ For reasons only known to Magi. ]
no subject
Man, he'd be in trouble if he ever faced up against a barber. [Unless carbon control meant he could rapidly grow hair which would be kind of creepy and scary] Anyway, what type of person thinks, 'yes, my hair will be my weapon, I'll throttle you to death with my luxurious locks!' Pfft, your Not-Dad is weird, Major Hyou-Kyou.
1/2
[ He'd smiled to himself about it, back then, but he didn't (and doesn't) judge. Deep down he knows: all of the oddballs around him crave acceptance more than anything, and that's what he's tried to give them all these years.
The image of Magi fades from the plate, and — to his great surprise — he feels a little empty inside. He forces a smile. ]
Anyway, looks like they're putting out —
2/2
What did you call me???
no subject
[Kazuya smiled, clasping his hands behind his back and rocking slightly on his heels - he looked so innocent, to the point where it was obvious that he was intentionally being a little shit]
It sounds cute, right? Totally. I think it fits you perfectly!
[Was he calling you cute? Probably. To be honest Kazuya thought he looked kinda snappy in that uniform, even if it was a bit creepy that he was wearing a middle-school one when Kaz got the vibe that he was older than that. He must be a pervert in disguise. Or... one that was pretty open in his kinks. Well, whatever, Kaz wasn't going to judge a man on his private... desires... so long as they were harmless]
But, if you don't like it, I guess I can call you Hyou-ojii-san.
1/2
It doesn't escape him that Kazuya just called him — in a roundabout fashion — "cute." This old soul, or alternately this regular seventeen-year-old twerp is flirting with him. ]
no subject
That's rich, coming from an "old soul."
[ He slides his hands into his pockets and turns his back on Kazuya and begins to walk off... ]
Heh. I've been called worse. Come on.
[ ...in the direction of the banquet tables, which are being set up as a buffet, piled high with every delicacy imaginable, from intricate salads with colorful vegetables cut into complex geometrical shapes, to succulent steaks, their aromas rising into the air, to many-layered cakes decorated with spun-sugar flowers. ]
no subject
[Oh, well, that was true. For the few years Hyoubu could be blagging, Kazuya still had a good few... thousand? Ten thousand? Something with far too many zeros in there, he was sure. But, hey, since he couldn't remember those years, and this body was seventeen years old, then technically speaking he couldn't be an old fogey! Right?!
(As you can see, Kazuya was determined to cling to his youth. He will never forsake it!)]
O-Old soul isn't- oi~ [He huffed as Hyoubu walked off, and after a brief moment of debate, followed him - then realising he was going towards food, practically bolted right past the esper to skid to a halt before the buffet table, looking like he'd been dumped right into heaven.
For you see, after spending time half-starved of food, scrambling after what rations were left over after the rest of the people and demons had at it, one gained a deeper appreciation for food, and this right here, man, he could marry this buffet table right now. All his favourites in one place, right there, ready for the taking, without him having to drop kick some monster in the head to get to it. Amazing]
Nnnhhhh... [An incoherent noise of absolute happiness, Kazuya clasped his hands together and looked ready to swoon] Ah, look at all of this! There's cheesecake and- holy shit, oh my god, is that mint ice cream? Ah, there's steak too!
[Looks like Hyoubu's been forgotten in the haze of food-lust. Sorry, Major]
no subject
[ He's well acquainted with this degree of food delight, given the circumstances of the kids he rescues. It's why he strives to feed and house them as lavishly as possible, with his ill-gotten gains. Smiling to himself, he levitates a plate into the air and starts telekinetically serving himself. As it turns out, he likes good food, too.
...even if he's aware there might be some nasty consequences, which given his experiences with this place seems fairly likely.
#yolo. ]
no subject
[At this point, Kazuya had began The Great Gorging, so his reply was basically a primitive grunt that could mean either 'what?', 'no', or 'bugger off I'm busy'. After a pause he did finish off the entire cheesecake he'd been in the middle of demolishing - albeit messily, with crumbs and everything smeared around his mouth - to properly reply]
Eh. Well, food was... [he paused, looking hesitant] Um. Scarce? In a way...
[Understatement. It was scarce to the point where people would murder each other for it. Yeah. That scarce. The amount of times he saw people brutally murder someone just to grab a bag of disgusting rations or stale bread or... anything edible. It was insane. Kazuya rapidly began to look uncomfortable and hurried to move the conversation along]
S-So! You know, not used to this kind of luxury! Gonna take advantage of it while I can, even if it means I'm pukin' it up afterwards!
no subject
(except for the fact that — naturally — people with powers were always banned from such competitions)
The ridiculousness of the boy's cheesecake-smeared face combined with the obvious discomfort in his expression... the effect is almost unbearably poignant. ]
That seems counterproductive. Relax.
[ Hyoubu smiles, and touches Kazuya's shoulder. ]
This place has its challenges, but fortunately lack of food isn't one of them.
no subject
Those're jinxing words, y'know. [he made a short gesture with his (cheesecake stained) hand, obviously warding off misfortune - even casting a wary look about him as if expecting Famine himself to come swooping down on horseback] Better not tempt fate... knowing my luck, God'll decide that'll be my next ordeal. 'Endless Famine!' or something equally stressful.
no subject
Hm.
He pats the boy's shoulder and then lets his hand fall away. ]
Sounds like you've been through a lot. Want to talk about it?
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Oh dear. Oh my. He slipped a bit too much - although he acknowledged it was going to happen from the start. Kazuya was terrible at lying and keeping secrets, especially concerning something like the lockdown. Though it was a horrifying experience that traumatised him deeply (waking up in cold sweat - avoiding sleep - jumping at unexpected touches - feeling that alien insidious hunger gnawing at his bones- it hurt - it felt good - no -) to the point where he was certain he probably needed a shrink in there to make him sane, it was like a scab he couldn't stop picking.
"Talk about it." He wanted to, because it would be relieving, and maybe someone would realise he was fucked up, but at the same time, it was too much effort and trouble to deal with those eyes. Crazy kid, that's all he should be]
...what's there to say? [Kazuya managed to wipe his face clean - finally - with his sleeve, revealing an odd, bordering on unsettling, smile] It was just humans being humans. Scarier than...
[Than demons, can you believe? At least a demon was rather straightforward about its desire to kill you, and Kazuya didn't mind dismembering them. Humans, on the other hand...]
It's weird. I kind of want to say, because you're a stranger, so it doesn't matter if you get disgusted with me, and it would be quite nice to unload. But... [well, he's a coward too. Ah... he should have just said it from the beginning. He dug himself into a hole now] Well, I guess... so long as you promise not to organise a mob for a lynch session, I can vent a little.
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I know exactly how humans can be.
[ He can't read Kazuya's mind, but he can read the boy's expression. Wariness, temptation, fear, self-recrimination... he's seen it all before. This kid's been through it, and he needs someone who understands, and won't judge. If only he himself had had anyone like that, back then...
Not that it matters, to an old ghost. He waves Kazuya over to a nearby table, and sits down, his own plate of food settling itself down telekinetically beside him. ]
Vent all you like.
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Where to even start... [he started shredding a buttery croissant to pieces, picking at it like a bird, a sharp contrast to his earlier, messy hunger] This has got, like, four different beginnings, and all of them are equally messed up and confusing. Plus background info...
[He trailed off. He pondered as he slowly made his way through the croissant, starting at the corner of the table. After a few minutes of this, he straightened up slowly, and brushed his hands together. Eh, he'll just plunge straight into it. Demons, Gods... it might be normal stuff in this guy's world, after all, supernatural powers were, so...]
I'll guess I'll go with something recent - I mean, this story goes back thousands of years, if you can believe it. Anyway, Naoya - remember him? - got this brilliant idea one day. [Judging by Kazuya's tone, this idea was, in fact, terrible] He decided - with a bit of funding from this cult - to create a device that would allow demon summoning without getting bogged down with all the rituals and needing to sacrifice something or have the knowledge of it at all.
[He made a small circle in the air with his finger, speaking slowly;] To summon a demon, you need to sacrifice something, or have a desire so strong, so emotionally charged, that you can sustain it that way. Naoya got rid of all that, so that the common joe could just pick up this device and summon a demon - with a catch, though. You have to be able to defeat the demon that comes out of it, since they follow a strict hierarchy of strength. They don't obey weaklings. Hah, you can imagine the chaos this caused when it was mass-distributed within Tokyo.
[Torn up roads and cars, corpses in the street, demons running wild... yeah...]
Thousands of people were killed within the first few days, then you had those who did defeat their demons and managed to control them. Some of them went a bit nuts and thought they could do whatever they wanted. Society broke down pretty fast, and worse of all, the only thing the government could do was put the 'infected zone' into a strict lockdown. Everyone was trapped in there, with crazy people and demons, and if they tried to escape, they got shot dead. Demons can take human forms, so, you know, they had to be careful.
[Kazuya sighed suddenly, as if it was something inconvenient, rather than traumatising]
I was stuck right in the middle of that. Why? Because Naoya had a plan. A brilliant one by his reckoning, but I think it was stupid. [pause] And, uh, immoral, since he technically mass murdered like half of Tokyo's population. It's messed up. Isn't that messed up? Do you know what people did there? I mean, demons are terrible, but they're like animals! They kill humans to eat them, end of. People just... ugh, they did horrible things, messed up stuff, and it was like infectious! One of my friends went off the deep end and began killing people who were 'unworthy of living'. Who gets to decide that? What, did God keel over and make Keisuke his successor? Like hell! Not even God gets to decide stuff like that because it's human lives goddammit!
[he kicked the leg of the table, making the plates jump, looking genuinely furious for a moment before it simmered into something more neutral looking]
It makes me so mad. So many people died over something so pointless.
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...except, does he really?
It's a small voice in the back of his mind, the voice of the child he used to be. Most of the time he can ignore it, or drown it out. But just now, listening to Kazuya's horrifying account, that voice is unopposed, as the rest of him is shocked into silence.
How much do you want your revenge? How deep is your hate?
He'd already decided to set aside his differences with BABEL in order to defeat Black Phantom and change the future. His Queen's life is more important than his revenge. But if he could have it all — saving the Queen's life and destroying all Normals — would he want it? ]
I don't have any answers.
[ For a moment, he seems surprised that he said that out loud. Then his features smooth out and he smiles, thinly. ]
Most deaths are pointless, in a war. People's lives are the most precious.... and the most disposable things in the world.
[ He sighs. ]
You might as well tell me. What was Naoya's plan?
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There was no way to explain Naoya's plan without revealing sensitive things, but thus far Major Hyou-Kyou had taken things in stride, was peculiar himself, and possessed supernatural abilities. Perhaps Kazuya could expose himself without worry of judgement or needing to treat him dismissively just so that any words from fear or anger wouldn't touch him]
To get revenge, obviously. Only people with that on the brain would do something so stupid. [Kazuya's tone was practically dripping with disdain, and his next bite of the tart was particularly vicious] You think after a few thousand years you'd let bygones be bygones, but no, seemed like he had nothing better to do than stew on a grudge instead of, y'know, doing something productive for society. Better yet, he decides to sacrifice a shit load of people for it and almost end humanity itself just to settle a score - and even better, he dragged me into it!
[CHOMP. That poor tart was practically being savaged]
I'm not comfortable in being a murderer - wow, what a concept! It's like I have a sense of decency or something! You know, enough of a fucking brain to go "well, that happened a long time ago, and clinging to that past is just going to fuck over the future and hurt people who are in no way, shape, or form, related to that, so may as well move forwards", but no, he's so stuck in the past he may as well be a fossil.
[The cherry tart was finished, brutually devoured by a steaming mad Kazuya. He roughly wiped his mouth clean of crumbs and hissed venomously;] He's such a child! A stupid, immature brat! You know what, next time I see him I'm gonna wallop him. Yeah! I'll beat some sense into that thick skull of his! Psh, someone needs to... that little... [Mutter, mutter, grumble, grumble, murderous glowering...]
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I won't deny that revenge is stupid, or that it doesn't make sense. But sometimes there's nothing left, for a person, except revenge. Some things you just can't get over, whether it's decades or thousands of years. To let "bygones be bygones"... that's like saying that it was okay, what happened. That you're fine with it. That you're fine with the things that are still happening.
[ His voice had started out measured, his face calm, but now he's shaking. His fists are clenched. ]
As for hurting innocents... no one is innocent, if they're content to mindlessly go along with the status quo.
[ He pushes back from the table. ]
Well, I'm sorry you had to get your hands dirty and have your sense of decency offended. But most of the time you have to break things before you can fix them. Somebody has to take that on.
[ He knows... he knows that his situation and Kazuya's are likely very different. That Naoya might have been motivated by nothing more than blind hatred, like Gilliam. But Kazuya's account of things has struck a nerve, and he can't really control himself. ]
Somebody has to be the bad guy.
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Oh.
Oh.
Hyoubu was...]
Are you serious? Didn't you hear me earlier? You don't have the right to judge someone on whether they're innocent or not, especially on something like 'ignorance', you-
[Kazuya stopped, then let out a heavy sigh, but it wasn't irritated or frustrated - he sounded more sad than anything. Keisuke thought that - thought that killing those he deemed unworthy of living, criminals and 'bad guys', would create a world more peaceful, but how can peace be built on top of the bones of others? Naoya dragged humanity into his personal grudge against God, not caring what happened to innocent people so long as he was satisfied, and Kazuya himself, who was pushed into the position of being humanity's Judge, Jury and Executioner, even if he rarely acted in the third role. It was not a position he fulfilled happily, content to push for forgiveness and redemption, as oppose to outright execution.
How can revenge and violence solve anything? It doesn't. It caused temporary peace, and then it would begin all over again, a new scar or tragedy that carried into a new generation. Kazuya wished he could somehow impart this knowledge on Hyoubu, since he did seem like an okay guy - a bit twisted by hatred, now that he was looking, but ultimately a man who was not wholly evil. But alas, Kazuya knew he wasn't very good when it came to words or inspiring speeches, and if anything made people angrier and more stubborn instead. Still, he wanted to at least try]
I know it isn't easy, forgiving a deep wrong against yourself or others. [Kazuya's voice was soft] But trust me when I say it never ends well. It may be all you have left, but hatred's like quicksand. The longer you stay in there, the deeper it's gonna suck you in, and the next thing you know, everything's distorted and...
[He remembered, vaguely, when he himself was like that, though it was more like a dream of a memory, rather than the memory itself. Of when Naoya - Cain - smashed that rock into his skull and murdered him with such singleminded viciousness, where he - Abel - cried and screamed and begged and died and felt such hatred that he tore himself apart to become a demon of vengeance instead. Looking at that hazy memory, Kazuya terrified himself. He didn't want anyone to transform into anything like that again - not Naoya, who was already some form of monster but not beyond help, and not this Hyoubu Kyousuke, either, even though he was a near stranger. The man was twisted, but still very kind. It'd be a shame if he became a monster - a bad guy - for real]
...well, you pretty much become what you're revenging against.
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Saotome was a monster, as were his collaborators, as are all the Normals who prey upon espers.
He'd been half-standing up during Kazuya's speech, but now he sits down again, heavily. ]
You're right about that.
[ He's a monster, too. He has no illusions about that. After a while, the cloud across his face passes, his features smooth out, and he even manages a smile. ]
Well. Do you feel better now, having unburdened yourself?
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Kind of. I think? Ish, maybe. I got too riled up. [he slouched in his seat, choosing which poor meal to demolish gruesomely] Bad memories aren't pleasant, even if you get like a two second bit of relief for picking at them.
[He picked up a simple-made ham sandwich, looking at it contemplatively for a moment before saying with forced casualness;] Besides, I never got round to my confession, since it's going to come out at some point. I mean, you seem like a very open minded guy, revenge issue aside, so I guess it'll be fine. Not like I care or anything, but people tend to get fussy over it.
[Once he says it, and Hyoubu accepts - well, then Kazuya can properly relax around someone and won't worry about checking himself, since he'd know the important, dark secrets to be 'in the know'. If not, then, well, he'll still hang around if he'd tolerate that, but Kazuya will know to not get emotionally invested. Safer that way.
He took a bite out of his sandwich, looking anywhere but Hyoubu, a brief pause settling over them as he chewed and swallowed. He sighed;] Okay, fuck it: I'm a demon, just so you know.
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He should have anticipated this punchline, he realizes in retrospect, what with the whole "becoming the thing you hate" commentary. And "humans being humans." Now that he's paying attention, he fancies he can feel the self-loathing coming off the boy (he still thinks of Kazuya as a boy) in waves. So he's careful to keep his features composed, maintaining an expression of interest and anticipation even after Kazuya drops his bombshell, as if to imply, "is that all?" And then, when it's clear Kazuya is finished, he leans back and says pleasantly: ]
I'm afraid that really doesn't mean much to me. Demons are mythical creatures. They don't really exist. You might as well tell me you're a dragon.
[ He glances at Kazuya's ham sandwich, and then pointedly at the piles of food, and then back at Kazuya. ]
You don't still snack on humans, do you?
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I remember being human enough to be against cannibalism. [he pulled a face at the thought - and decided not to admit to the fact that most demons were psychic vampires anyway, devouring the emotions humans experienced like some kind of succubus. The more intense, the better. As for the physical eating, well, apparently demons just liked the taste] Nope, cakes and steaks and all kinds of snacks are my main food source, so don't worry about me eyeing you up for dessert.
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[ He watches Kazuya, taking in the look of disbelief, and then the tension flowing out of him, followed by a flicker of a smile. It's a familiar sight, to him. Espers are commoner now than they were in the past, and often a single esper child would be born into a town that had never seen one before. And if they were powerful...
The look on their faces when he rescued them and told them, no, you're not a monster. This is what he's seeing now, on Kazuya's. ]
And I was going to say, I suggest that you don't make a meal of my acquaintances, either.
[ There's a delicate emphasis on the word "suggest" which implies painful, drawn-out, bloody revenge. He says it with a bright smile, however, and adds: ]
But since you prefer more conventional means of sustenance, there's no need. I'm what's called an "esper," by the way. In my world, I suspect it means the same thing as "demon" does in yours.
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